Kristy Goes to the Avatar World
by Dreaming of Everything
Summary: Kristy's fallen into the Avatar world and finds out that she's a spiritbender! Will Zuko let her help him? Well, no. Unfortunately for her, the Laws of Canon are in working order today... PARODY


**Title: **Kristy Falls into the Avatar World and Discovers She is an Ultra-Rare and Special Animal Bender

**Disclaimer:** Sadly, Kristy is a creation of my own. The idea of Mary-Sues is _not_ my own, the Avatar characters are not my own, and does anybody want to take Kristy off my hands? Please? She won't shut up about lip-gloss.

**Summary:** Kristy's fallen into the Avatar world and finds out that she's a spirit-bender! Will Zuko let her help him? Well, no. Unfortunately for her, the Laws of Canon are in working order today... .:PARODY:.

**Author's Notes:** Yes, the title powers don't agree with her powers in the fic and summary. That is on purpose.

This whole fic is a reaction to really bad Mary-Sues. And I'm sorry, but the falling-into-the-Avatar-world plot was over-done **before** anyone wrote any.

"My name's Kristy!" said the girl, her tone perky and bright. "I'm really from another world. The other day I was walking down the street and all of a sudden I fell into this world! Isn't that just so cool?" She flashed the group of fire nation soldiers a bright smile, rosy lips parting to reveal perfect teeth.

"Anyways, I found out that I could spirit-bend when I was attacked by these _horrible_ soldiers led by this total bitch, Zula or something. I totally kicked her ass."

"This girl," proclaimed Zuko, "Will be a valuable asset for our quest to capture the Avatar. Will you join us to help me regain my honor in the eyes of my father and country?"

"Hee hee!" giggled a senile and slightly manic-looking Iroh in the background. He was crouched protectively over a pot of tea.

"Sure!" said the girl, running her hands through her silver hair with natural purple streaks that matched her lovely lavender orbs. "I'd love to help!"

_...And then the laws of Canon reasserted themselves, purging the miasmic influence of badfic from the land..._

"'Cool?'" muttered one soldier to another. "Is she cold?"

"I'm not sure..." said the other.

Iroh seemed to come to his senses, coming forward out of the mass of soldiers. He wondered why they were ignoring him; the soldiers wondered how he got behind them.

"Spirit-bend? Another world? The girl is obviously touched in the head."

There was an embarrassed murmur of assent from the assembled mass of people.

The girl--Kristy, and they could only wonder how much she had been teased as a child for such a strange name--pouted. She obviously thought the gesture was cute, which was slightly pathetic; it made her look like a sulky, self-absorbed seven-year-old.

"No! I **can** spirit-bend! I can because I wanna!"

"Show us, then, child," said Iroh, voice laden with the indulgence and concern people reserve for the insane and the very young.

'Kristy' (That just **couldn't** be her real name) began to wave her arms around, looking fairly unsure of what she was doing. Nothing happened. As she began to jerk around in a parody of some awkward, indecent dance a soldier sniggered, unable to control himself any longer.

"See? The girl is obviously crazy," said Iroh with an air of finality.

"I have no idea what came over me," said Zuko, looking slightly stunned. He hadn't been stupid enough to believe her, had he? He hadn't even been insulted that she had dared to approach the prince of the Fire Nation with such a disrespectful tone! And then for him to claim she would be a help... "She is clearly a danger to herself and others. We will leave her on the next abandoned island we come to." Iroh nodded his approval of the plan--he was also concerned about his earlier behavior. Was he truly going senile? It was especially interesting when combined with Zuko's unflinching acceptance of the crazy girl. Now that he thought about it, her arrival had been timed exactly with his irregular behavior... Iroh was beginning to worry that she wasn't just a crazy girl but was instead an evil spirit...

...An evil spirit who was currently thrashing around on the ground, wailing noisily and shrieking at the top of her lungs. All he could catch was something about how it "wasn't fair" and that she "really could" (he assumed that she was referring to her so-called 'spirit-bending' there) and something about how she was going to help Zuko understand that he didn't need to capture the Avatar because he already had love? That was crazy... Regardless, she knew too much--most people had no idea the Avatar had returned, and that was the way things should be. Things were difficult enough as they were.

"Gag her," he said, hoping that whatever had saved them from the creature's evil influence before would continue to work. He had no idea what would happen if that wasn't the case.

She was easy to subdue, being lightly built, unhealthily thin and totally untrained in any form of fighting, let alone one suited to her body type. Regardless of that, she continued to scream, changing her tune to something more along the lines of how powerful she was, and how she would come back and defeat them all. It was kind of amusing, actually, in a pitiful way.

They eventually got her onto an island, even changing course to get to one. She had a healthy pair of lungs if nothing else, and her shrieks grew tiresome very quickly. Every time someone reacted to her with a lack of interest, or with anything short of deep-seated interest she seemed slightly surprised, as if expecting them to automatically love her.

At least a few sailors started making signs meant to ward against evil before they went near her.

Everyone was very glad to see the last of her, though at least she had made the rats abandon ship. _They_ knew what evil smelled like.

_Elsewhere:_

The three people on the flying bison watched the splash in the water behind them, still panting from their struggle to dump the girl overboard.

"At least we got her off before she latched onto someone again," said Katara fervently.

"Damned Mary-Sues," said Sokka simply.

Aang just twitched in horror.

Katara couldn't help but listen to her mind's final whispered thought on the matter: _I hope drowning it was enough to kill it..._

And deep underwater, a beautiful mermaid princess, with ebony hair as long as she was and a voice like the ringing of bells, stirred...

-End-


End file.
